How to manage stress in the 21st Century

One thing I read a lot about with regards to stress managment is that companies need to do better at identifyting sources of stress. For example, the number one source of stress or ‘stressor‘ mentioned by UK workers is overwork and long hours.

This sounds pretty obvious and I don’t think many people would deny that long hours and hectic schedules are connected to potential chronic stress, anxiety and tiredness.

But what some of us don’t realize is that while these ‘stressors’ are linked to feelings of stress and even longer-term depression, they are not responsible for our stress and negative emotions.

hypnosis for stress in Bournemouth

This simple equation explains how most companies think when it comes to stress management:

A (the stressor/external event or situation)      =     C  (stress/negative consequences)     

So in this way…

Long Hours  = Stress

Poor working enviroment = Stress

Workplace bullying   = Stress

However, both psychology, neuroscience and conclusions from experienced therapists around the world confirms that this way of thinking is plain wrong.

The reality is that people perceive and experience stress in many different ways. Stress is subjective.

One person’s stress is another’s pleasure..

Two people can both work a ten hour day or be in the same stressful enviroment and yet feel completely differently about their work.

What is often different is that individual’s personal story of stress and what causes it. A belief that a bad boss or colleague is responsible for their stress and anxiety at work may be so strong that the person now associates work with negative emotions.

Even just driving to work in the morning can trigger a sense of anxiety and dread. The stress becomes a habitual response and the mind is constantly on red-alert.

Unable to find a solution, leave their job or simply do away with the bully with an ice-pick, the sufferer replays any negative experiences, comments and feelings associated with their tormenter.

After a period of time feeling this way, this person can come to believe that their job or ‘that person’ is the direct cause of all the negative feelings they are experiencing. However, after helping hundreds of people deal with stress and anxiety in Bournemouth, I came to the conclusion that it is the individual’s perceptions,beliefs and personal narrative which often reinforce their stress and anxiety.

A more helpful way of looking at things is the equation:

A  +  B   = C

A (Bad Boss) +   B (Beliefs/thoughts/previous experiences and expectations)  = (RESPONSE)

In this new and revised equation, B beomes the secret sauce of the whole experience. Our beliefs, thoughts and perceptions act as a kind of mental filter which can colour the way we respond to external situations and people.

Now, I admit this is not exactly Stephen Hawking territory, but if we absorb the truth of it, life becomes quite liberating. If we accept that it is how we think about something which determines the effect it has on us, the idea of something outside of ourselves causing us stress becomes less plausible.

It suggests we shouldn’t blame the boss for years of suffering but instead that we have ultimate control over our emotional responses to things.


Hypnotherapy for Stress management in Bournemouth and the UK

There are many stress management programs, courses, books, trainers and techniques in the UK and most of these dish up the same advice; identify your stressors or stress triggers and learn behavioural techniques to better manage the symptoms.

The problem is that after a course or series of CBT (Cognitive Behavioual Therapy) group sessions, the person’s inner beliefs, fears, desires and motivation haven’t shifted. Logically the stress sufferer knows that their negative thoughts are unhelpful, but something inside them seems to derail or sabotage their good intentions.

Ever heard of the ‘monkey in your mind’?

This is why hypnosis for stress and anxiety can be incredibly effective. Hypnosis helps people slow down a racing, aggravated mind so it can focus on better solutions to situations which on the surface seem insurmountable.

Imagine that feeling, a few days into a well-deserved holiday where you were able to just enjoy the moment and let the cares of the last few, hectic months just float over you. You know they are still there to be solved but your mind feels clearer and more rested.

Hypnosis for stress management – A mental re-set button…

After a hypnosis session, many clients tell me that it’s as if all the ‘stuff’ or mental rubbish has finally been emptied or that their worries and racing thoughts have drained away, like water down a plug hole!

Hypnotherapy for stress is effective because it focuses on the one thing that a person can change – their beliefs and perceptions. It is a powerful but gentle process whereby someone can use their own imagination to pin-point what is going wrong in a situation and then rehearse a new mental strategy which feels better.


Hypnotherapy relaxes the mind so it can absorb new instructions, thoughts and beliefs. By using visualisation, skills clients can take avantage of the same mental training elite athletes enjoy.

They learn to imagine themselves in situations which, have in the past caused them stress, fear or failure but this time they can be taught to react more effectively, or cope more easily.

After practice, these new mental skills become habit. The brain now associates stressors like a bad boss or a stressful office enviroment with a more positive and balanced set of responses that are more appropriate.


Reduce stress with hypnotherapy 

As a Bournemouth stress consultant I have helped many professionals, busy working mums and overwhelmed business-owners take back control of their emotions, reduce anxiety, improve their relationships and sleep more soundly at night.

If you would like to experience a free hypnosis session just click the link below!


To start feeling better today, why not take the next step and give me a call on 0798 444 1710 and we can arrange a free consultation to see exactly how you can reduce stress and regain your confidence.